Your mom is as fat as NASA's company.
Government Jokes
Anyone know about the war? It's not Russia we should hate, it's Putin that we should. 🙄🤪💅
What is the difference between the President of Ukraine and the President of the United States?
The President of Ukraine is a comedian, and the President of the United States is a joke!
Random person: We are taking away your freedoms to keep you safe.
Hitla: That's exactly what I said.
Why do they call my dick section 8?
Because all the hoes are on it.
"Have you driven through Dealey Plaza? It will blow your mind."
~John F. Kennedy
Have you seen the inside of Ford's Theatre? It will blow your mind. ~Abraham Lincoln
In America, you work on a plantation.
In Soviet Russia, the plantation works on you!
By the way, why are there no knock knock jokes about America?
Because freedom rings, but they never answer that door.
Enjoy!
Why did the people in 9/11 not call 911? Because it would call the pilots.
In America, you fight Ukraine.
In Soviet Russia, you fight Mykraine.
Hello my fellow Americans, I'm playing Clash Royale for the USA clan, and two towers are already gone?
To all the little rude people here, fuck you. I didn't ruin this country, it was Putin!
Did you hear they just took Biden to the hospital?
No, what happened?
He couldn’t stop pootin!
I'm Joe Biden's husband.
Not even the FBI knows where an orphan's parents are.
Hello my fellow Canadians, I mean Americans. I, your cool and hip president, has decided to give everyone free ice cream! Even the Russians. Go out to your local ice cream shop and make sure to leave your kids at home!
I'm Joe Biden's husband.
Who is king of the pencils?
The ruler!
BIDEN!
