Good jokes
Friend: Hey, did you catch that game last night? I did, it was so good! After that I went to Kaneβs, because Kane's is amazing! What did you do this weekend? I did-
Me: Dude, are you the Terms and Conditions? Because I donβt give a fuck about what you say.
Stephanie
Not a joke, but here's a good workout, I guess:
Sit-ups: 50
Push-ups: 40
Squats: 30
Do 5 sets.
This is two heads.
Deaf. "Deep water." ""
- "78 years."
Are you interested again? ""
"If you go ... you are there."
"No. 85 is good."
What is the most important value? It does not take cheese.
When a woman is something weeks or months pregnant and her stomach has a visible bump, everyone rubs her tummy, but no one tickles the husband's balls and says, "Good job, buddy!"
Memes
Stonks
I'm so good at talking to myself but not to others.
They say that bad things happen to good people.
So if you get run over by a car just know you're a good person.
Three good friends decided to meet in their favorite caffe.
The meetup was a successful one, because they all enjoyed themselves.
I can't remember the last full conversation I had with my grandfather.
Good thing is, since he hit his head, he can't remember either.
Yo mama so nasty, she gave yo daddy head, then gave you a kiss good night.
I'm 5'6", and my mom is 5'1" and 1/2. She always says she's going to get a suicide vest and fill it with bricks and squish me. I tell her good luck.
And when she tries to hug me, she says, "You're too fucking tall, kid," so I usually reply with "Go get a stool then."
Hey guys! Just a reminder that the guy below me is a crying bitch! Have a good day!
I was watching The Perfect Murder with my boyfriend. It was a good movie, but the weird thing was that my boyfriend was taking notes throughout the whole movie.
Why was the rapper always in good shape?
Because he never skipped a beat!
Why didn't the movie star argue with the customer service clerk?
He didn't have a good counter act!
Why was the rapper always calm during storms?
Because he had a good FLOW.
Why aren't Americans good at Clash Royale?
Because they already lost 2 towers.
Why did the rapper become a MATH TEACHER?
Because he was good with bars and beats.
Why don't rappers ever make good chefs?
Because they always drop the beet!
Why was the rapper so good at math?
Because he had great FLOW-CULUS skills!