Go jokes
Once there was this kid that wanted to shower with his dad, so his dad said yes. Then he asked, "What is that?" and his dad said it's a chow chow train.
The next day, he wanted to shower with his mom, so she said yes. He asked again, "What is that?" and she said it was a tunnel with light.
The same day, he wanted to sleep with them, and they said yes.
In the middle of the night, he woke up and told his mom to turn on the light because the chow chow train is going in.
"Hey, what does IDK mean?"
"I don't know."
"Okay, then I am going to ask someone else."
What do iPhone batteries and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both go down quickly.
Why don’t some couples go to the gym?
Because some relationships don’t work out.
Hello everyone! I just came back! How are things going?
The only profession where one could have coronavirus and still go to work is a suicide terrorist.
Hey guys, I just wanna say what happened to Kanye; he is one of my favorite rappers, and he’s going through a hard time. I don’t see why people can’t just spread love and kindness like me💕
I think that Kanye was right to say what he said. I completely support him, and I don’t understand why people hate on him for using his 1st amendment, and Yeezy should be sued for it.
Quote of the day: Love bests hate as for hate is the killer of friendships - Collin Kaepernick
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't go home.
Me: What do we need from there? I have a few things to do before I head out to the store, and then I will be home to pick up the stuff.
Random person: What stuff? 🤨
Me: What?
The person: You said you’re going to pick up “the stuff”!!! What do you mean by that?!
Me: Colourful flamingo fart.
Trump can get banned. The cops can tack him to jail, and Trump go go go go bye bye for good. Trump is meing.
Where did the orphan go after the orphanage blew up everywhere?
Yo momma so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down!
Where do cows go for entertainment?
The MOOOOvie theater.
Why did the ducks go to jail?
They sold quack.
Is your tap water running well?
Beta, go catch it!
Signs my cousin is going places when he's older:
TEST QUESTION: Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
He wrote: "At the bottom of the page."
Smart kid!
I was going to make a 9/11 joke, but I'm afraid it will crash and burn.
I still remember my dad's last words, "You c***! You let the ladder go, you cuuunt!"
Smack! He hit the ground and bled out.
At least Stephen Hawking could go on a pub crawl.
I had to go to the doctor for a prostate exam. When he stuck it in, I started to squirm, so he held onto my shoulder.
I thought it was going well, until he grabbed my other shoulder as well.