Girls jokes

Think about how many more girls we guys could get if we talked to them how we talk to other guys, like when they say, "Can I borrow a pencil?" You say, "You can borrow this hard wood dick."

My penis is so polite. It stands up so girls can sit down.

I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... She died of hearing aids.

A 14 year old girl finds out she is pregnant. Her: "Crap! My mom is going to kill me!"

The fetus: "lol same here."

How do you know if spaghetti is a boy or a girl? It's meatballs.

You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"

How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?

What are the similarities between a 14-year-old pregnant girl and her unborn fetus?

They are both thinking, "Oh sh*t, my mom's gonna kill me."

I was walking this hot girl home, then she noticed me, then the walk turned into a run.

Why can't a girl with no legs play soccer? Because she's a girl.

Emo girls be like, "How much am I worth?"

Girl, scan the code on your wrist.

I saw a little girl crying, and I said, "Where are your parents?" That day, I got fired from the orphanage. 🤪

How do you get the emo girl out of the tree?

You cut the rope.

Don't you just love wrecking little girl's pussies? Like the tight feeling is just amazing. The great amount [of] ecstasy you feel when you cum and they get all squirmy. It's just the best.

Okay, boys are known to measure their dicks, but do girls measure their depths?

Why do girls not have balls?

Because they don’t.

This anorexic girl wanted to fight me. I told her that I would roast her, but she didn't have any meat.

Why do teenage girls travel in odd-numbered groups?

Because they can't even.

I always wonder what girls are thinking about. Maybe balls.

I told a diabetic girl to have sweet dreams...

she died the next morning.

I saw a fat girl with a 'Guess' t-shirt, so I said, "286lb."