Girl jokes

So... here's da scoop, alright... *licks KFC off lips* so, I was caught having sex wit three 6 year olds (girls btw, just in case you guys get mad) and da judge told me I was getting da death penalty, you know what I mean?

I had a last resort to save myself though, you feel me? So I told da judge, I said to him, I said: "Yo honah, 6 + 6 + 6 = 18, you smell me?"

Needless to say, I was announced a fre-e-e-e-e-e-e man after dat, you feel me?

But then, the Predator Poachers nigckas just barged into the courtroom and they said: 4 + 4 + 5 = 13!

Alas, I'm writing this joke from jail, and judging by the look my prisonmate Tyrone is giving me, I'll be writing jokes from hell from now on.

At gym class today, my friend made this song:

🎵 I’m a Barbie girl, I am fantastic, my boobs are plastic!

Your dick is so small they thought you were a girl when you came into the world.

Boy: Wanna hear about my dick? Never mind, it's too short.

Girl: Wanna hear about my pussy? Fuck no, you won't get it.

"Jump in the Cadillac, girl, let's put some miles on it."

I like this Russian girl, but she hasn't asked me to hang off a cliff while drinking vodka.

My mom: "Dear, I don't know why your grandma is spending more time with her friend Carla, can you spy on her?"

Me: "Your mom gay lol."

My mom: "Don't talk about your grandma like that, you rude girl."

You: "Your mom gay lol."

What do you call a wizard who can't secure a girl? Fumbledore.

My mom has a toy that I see all the girls and guys seem to play with, and the toy is between my mom's legs.

I said I was going to my flat. I really meant your girl.

What do hockey players and Surrey girls have in common?

They both only change their pads after every third period!

How do you turn a cat into a fish?

Tell your girl not to wash down there.

What’s the difference between a mountain and your girl?

At least the mountain has two hills.

I dated an Indian girl for about six months. She was always Sikhing attention.

So I was living with a girl for a few weeks, and it was nice until she found out that I was there.

What Disney movie does the church make little girls watch?

Snow White and the Seven Deadly Sins.

What do you call a blonde girl standing on her hands?

A brunette with bad breath.

When your girlfriend says it is too small, you say, "Just enjoy the small thing."

What does a sex offender that is a lesbian have in common with a sex offender that is a feminist?

They only performed cunnilingus on girls under 18 years old.

When your mum sold you on eBay for £2 pound for girls stripper.