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Church

    • What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? You don't get something in return if you give money to a church.

  • 2

    • Misunderstanding

    • My girlfriend is incredibly sad since her cat has disappeared.

    I am quite sure now that I misunderstood something when she asked me to eat her pussy--and I am beginning to think that I did not get the "fuck her doggy" part either.

  • 1

    • Forest

    • A kid and a man are walking into a forest at night.

    Kid: "Mr., it's getting dark. I'm scared!"

    Man: "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone!"

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    Fart

    • Gary and Steve are having sex and the phone rings. Steve goes to answer the phone and tells Gary, "Hey, don't finish yourself until I get back." After returning from the other room, there is cum all over the bed and wall of the bedroom. "Jesus, Gary, I said not to finish yourself until I got back!" Gary turns to him and says, "I didn't, I farted."

  • 13

    • Chicken

    • Jimmy: Why did the chicken cross the road?

    Joe: Why?

    Jimmy: To get to the idiot’s house.

    Jimmy: Knock knock.

    Joe: Who’s there?

    Jimmy: It’s the chicken.

    Minecraft

    • Minecraft YouTube, but I can sing Believer!

    YouTube, but I'm making a first video in YouTube.

    And I record all the Minecraft videos and upload.

    Ooohh! To try it and upload. Ooohh!

    I've been recorded to streaming, couple more sleeps to do the dreaming.

    I finally get to the stronghold, and if you told me, you told me, you told me, you told me.

    Place some more ender eyes, and it's time to big surprise.

    It's time to kill the ender dragon, go into the...

    END!

    Take that crystal, take that crystal, Believer, Believer!

    Knock him down, knock him down, Believer, Believer!

    Axe it's head, axe it's head.

    Axe it's head, defeat him.

    SUBSCRIBE!!!

  • 0

    • Sex

    • One time a girl was telling her boyfriend if she could have sex with him for just a little bit, and he said sure, so she just started having sex. She asked him if they could have a baby, but he said sure and started going hard. She told him she was joking, but he wouldn't get off. So she did the 69, and months later, she died, and he said he thinks he killed her with sex.

  • 3

    • Sleep

    • What is a good night's sleep and what do I have for you?

    Walk home from home and walk walk home and get a good night and night sleep good day today and walk home and walk walk home and take care and walk walk home 🏠 was good fun night night I had dinner 🍽 night night love 💗

    Morbid jokes

    • A cop sees an old woman carrying two large sacks. One of the sacks has a hole and is leaking 20 dollar bills. The cop asks the woman, "Where did an old lady like you get all of that money?" She replies, "Well, there's a golf course behind my house and when golfers need to go to the bathroom, they stick their penis through a hole in my fence and pee into my yard. It became a problem because it kills the flowers." The cop asks, "So what did you do about it?" The old lady says, "I get my hedge clippers and I wait behind the fence. When a golfer sticks his penis through the fence, I grab ahold of it and shout GIVE ME $20 OR IT COMES CLEAN OFF!" "That seems fair enough," the cop says, "so what's in the other sack?" The old lady replies with, "Not everyone pays..."

  • 75

    • Man

    • Hey, my man, why you got them damn old, stanky-looking Whoopi Goldberg cornrows on you head? Are y'all twins, or boyfriend and girlfriend, 'cause if y'all are, go get married in Color Purple land.

    Comment

    • What was the comment that Vice President Harris said in the United States Senate when a blue dog democrat in the United States Senate called Vice President Harris a bitch?

    Kibbles 'N Bits!! Kibbles 'N Bits!! I is going to get me some Kibbles 'N Bits!!

  • 2