Get jokes

Why couldn't the annoying dog get on Papyrus's nerves?

HE'S A SKELETON. HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY.

Son: Dad, where are you?

Dad: Getting another one.

Son: Getting what?

Dad: Dad.

What does a pregnant slave and a "pay less" sale have in common?

Buy one, get one free.

The term "every 60 seconds" is so stupid.

You know Africans don’t get seconds.

I just prevented an 11-year-old from getting assaulted.

I decided to go home.

I just prevented a 10-year-old from getting assaulted.

Nothing much, I just decided to go home.

Do you like soccer? My favorite player is Ronaldo, but we can still get Messi.

What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts? A barber-queue.

I can't take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keep attacking him. That's what I get for buying a pure bred dog.

I don't get why bakers aren't wealthier. They make so much dough.

Your hairline goes so far back that it was getting whipped in the 1800s.

What do you get when you cross a corrupt lawyer with a crooked politician?

Chelsea Clinton.

A woman's age is harder to get than the President's phone number.

Every depressed person just has to say, "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE!" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child, and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building.

If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?

Where do babies get baptized?

So the priest can wash their sex toys.

All countries will get Covid.

Except China, they got it right off the bat.

What is the worst thing about dating a blind woman?

Getting her husband's voice just right.

How did you get into the tampon 100?

Pull some strings!

Beer Bottle: You break me, you get one year of bad luck!

Mirror: You kiddin' me? You break me, then y'all get seven years of bad luck!

Condom: Hahaha... (Condom walks off laughing)