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I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.

They told me a mask was enough to get into the supermarket.

They lied, everybody else was also wearing pants.

What do school shooting jokes and school shooting victims have in common? They never get old.

Q: What's the difference between an apple tree and an orphan?

A: Apples get picked! 😱

What kind of birthday cake do you get on September 11th?

Three small ones, so you can have a flight of different cake flavors!

What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?

They both get turned on by kids.