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You guys are literally mentally ill. You should get some help. This is so disgusting, ew!

A guy gets home from work to see his girlfriend packing, and he asks her why she is packing. The girl says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile." The guy goes, "A pedophile?" And she says, "Yes." The guy goes, "That's a big word for a 12-year-old."

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house.

Ok, wanna hear another one? Okay. Knock knock. (Who's there?) The chicken from the other joke.

Me: Why did the chicken cross the road?

My friend: To get to the other side?

Me: No, to get to the idiot's house.

My friend: Oh.

Me: Knock knock.

My friend: Who's there?

Me: The chicken.

I'm sorry, orphans, that you're getting bullied. Oh, I have to go, my MOM's calling me. We're going on a road trip to go to a FAMILY reunion!

Why is the oldest iPhone an orphan?

It can't get the iPhone XI or XR. It doesn't have a home button.

Today, a kid in a wheelchair was rolling around the class to get away from this one annoying kid, so I told him, "Brayden, just get up and walk away."

Science experts say when you get mad, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

What falls down the building and doesn't get up again?

An emo.

A guy was dying after getting stabbed in a church. He said to the priest, "Please say a prayer for me," and the priest said, "I ain’t got nun left." Then he died.