Gender jokes
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but there will always be something that offends feminists.
Who goes to a comedian show and gets offended?
A feminist.
Roses are red, the sky is blue, what do you do? Oh, never mind, I'm not homo like you.
The optimist thinks the glass is half full. The pessimist thinks the glass is half empty. The feminist thinks the glass is raping them.
Your mom's my dad. Think about that!
Bippity Boppity,
Women are property.
A random guy yelled at me, "Hey, slut!"
I walked towards him.
"I prefer slit," I said.
"Why?" He asked.
"You see these wrists?" I spat at him.
Daughter: Dad.
Dad: Yes honey?
Daughter: I'm lesbian.
Dad: Ok.
Daughter 2: Dad.
Dad: Yes?
Daughter 2: I'm lesbian too.
Dad: God, does anyone like boys around here?
Son: I do...
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde girl?
One stops sucking when you smack it.
Me: God, Bryce, do we really have to talk about this again?
Bryce: What?
Me: You're still talking shit!! I already told you! It's 9 inches! Stop saying it's 3!
P.S. I'm a girl.
Hi, I’m gay.
Why did God make men?
Because you can't teach a vibrator how to mow the lawn...
Why are all women's feet small? So they can stand closer to the stove.
What's that useless skin around the vagina and the boobies?
The women.
What do gay girls order in a bar?
Pussy juice.
Men, get into the kitchen and make me a sandwich!
Women, go chop some lumber!
White people, get back into the cotton fields!
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
As many as you like. They can’t change anything.
A man was hitting a woman with his d*ck. Someone ran up to the man and said, "That's domestic violence!" The man replied with, "No, it's not domestic violence, it's dumbass-d*ck violence!"
My friend once said my opinion didn't matter. I said, "Why did you call me a female?"
When you send a dick pic and she sends one back,
I'm glad mine is the biggest, so I get to fuck my dad again.