Furniture jokes
What did one chair say to the other?
"I'm so bummed out!"
Yo mama is so fat that her wheelchair had to be made into a couch!
Grocery stores are like IKEA: you have to assemble the food yourself.
I shit on your furniture.
Yo mama so fat that she needs 12 queen size mattresses to go to sleep.
Gotta go fast
How do you know when German people break into your house? When you can not find your bed.
I sat on a chair.
Your mom walked into a bar and broke all the furniture.
Yo mamma so fat, when she tried to sit down the chair ran away.
Yo mama so fat that when she sat on the couch, the couch got destroyed.
I threw a lamp at an emo kid and told him to lighten the f*ck up.
What does a human and a cat have in common? Both take my bed.
What does a pillow say when you live for a week? "Don't forget me!"
I like my kids like I like my lamps. Hung from the ceiling.
How do 4 gay guys fit on one stool at the same time?
They flip it over.
Yo mama so fat that she broke the chair by sitting on it.
Yo mama is so dumb, she sits on the TV and watches sofa.
How do you win a game of musical chairs? You steal the chair!
Why couldn't the button get off the couch?
Because his butt weighed a ton! (butt-ton)
You’re so short, you can swing your legs when you sit on a stool.