Friendship Jokes

Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin off and eat them, they die.

So I was in the bathroom at school washing and this girl walked out of the stall and she was like "hey can you make me laugh? I have been having a pretty bad day." And I was like sure and I was like come here and so she came over to me I was like girl look at ur self in the mirror and she started laughing so hard and she said I'm so ugly.

So one day I was walking home from school with my best friend sally. She was worried to get home because she was going to tell her mom that bob the class rep got her pregnant a eight months ago and now it was obvious she was pregnant. So I said “sally it’ll be ok I’m sure she’ll be happy to get a grandson” “yeah thanks suzy” she said to me then went into her house. The next few weeks she didn’t show up to school so I was like oh she must be in trouble with her mom I’ll go check on her So I walk up to her house and her mom answers with a baby boy in her hands “oh hello. Is that Sally’s son!! Can I see sally?” Her mom says sure and I go inside but she leads me to the backyard and I see a tombstone “here lies sally 2004-2020” so I ask her mom in tears “oh did she not make it through the birth?” And her mom replied “you could say that..”

heyos i just wanna say thanks to gwen on here she writes jokes and she got me thru a lot xx

How do two emo kids greet each other,

I like ya cuts g

Bro I love hanging out with white people, its either we play Yahtzee Or We Playin Nazi

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

DON'T COMMIT SUICIDE, THAT WOULD MAKE DJUNGELSKOG SAD!!!

why cant orphane play baseball? they cant find home

Why do orphans that go to there friends house friends mom:go back to your house it’s late Finn wait can I have your moms phone number Finn friends mom: wait aren’t you a orfinn wait don’t you have a phone Finn? wait I forgot you don’t have a phone because nobody wanted to get you a phone or to get you

I was trying to make friends and this one person came up to me they said “lettuce be friends?” I just laughed and said that was tearable

( Guy 1: Why my cat's so angry ? ) ( Guy 2: Because she wants to eat your big sausage ) ( Guy 1: Don't you ? ) ( Guy 2: Yeah it seems delicious ) ( Guy 1: Mmm so .. w-wait what are you doing ? I didn't think you mean the one in my lunch :< where are you leaving #_# ) **Meow ...** ( Guy 1: Shut up i will never feed you this sausage it's not for you :< -_- </3 )

Why is no one friends with Dracula? Because he's a pain in the neck.

Hailey: "Hey Brayden!"

Brayden: "Hey!"

*Music roles around*

*I tell Brayden Hailey likes him*

Brayden: "O_O"

Hailey: *Hides*

So sad </3 xD

What’s the hardest part about being friends with a turtle??

Getting them to come out of their shell.

I stole my friend's amnesia medication the other day, he was pretty pissed.

But I reminded him of the age-old mantra: "Forgive and forget!"

A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "that's my step ladder" he said "I never knew my real ladder."