Friends jokes

Where is the wall's favorite place to meet his friends?

Hello Honey Bunches, it's me, Your Narrator. I was told by my buddy youthpartorryan he's in the middle of a war... I may be super wholesome but war against my buddy? Ho ho ho, no! A STORM IS COMING. #BestFriends

James, sike, I lied, your mommy is pancakes, is so dry.

My best friend: Joey, sike, I lied, your Twitch is dry.

My other friends: the winner is................. my guy James!

My friend's dad died during 9/11. He was such a good pilot, but my friend kept disturbing him, so when his dad died, he said, "It was you who killed me" (to the child).

So the child said, "Yoo-hoo? What type of name is Yoo-hoo, but Yoo-hoo, Yoo-hoo come here, I need to kill you NOW."

Me: *sprays some perfume on myself*

Friend: Omg, that smells so good! You’re so aromatic, how do you not have a bf yet?

Me: ... I’m aromantic and aromatic. I do not desire romantic relationships with others although I do enjoy carrying lovely scents with me.

My friend called me fat, so I challenged him to a running race.

Your Roblox friend counts to 10, but she doesn't count to "too." Then Roblox says: "Damn. Your Roblox friend can't count."

My friend lives in a caravan park. His parents named him Money because they thought it was a type of currency.

When you're playing online with your friend, then you hear a kid scream: "No, Dad, please stop!" Scream ends with a gunshot.

Friend: My girls are like boomerangs; they always come back.

Me: Mine DON'T :(

I fucked the shit outta of my friend's mom with my 8 inch dick (Adrian). PS. Sorry, Adrian!

My friend Nickiya wanted to know what animal she'd be. I said that she would be a "Ni-cat-a."

Me: It smells like good fam.

Friend: What's good fam?

Me: Nothing much, what about you fam?

My friend's name is Campbell, so she must love soup.

I have 25 friends in the alphabet.

But I don't know why.

My friend's life.

Friend texting fat boy: I know you're on the group chat. I can see you looking at my texts.

Me: I can only see fat.

Qualification Check:

Single

Taken

Friended ✔

Friend 1: *turns off lights*

Friend 2: *is there with us*

Me: Woah! Where did friend 2 go?!

Two guys were walking down the street, and one of the guys told his friend he could talk any blond in the world into giving him a blowjob, any blond!

So the guy bet him 20 bucks and pointed to this cute blond sitting on the side of the road and said, "Alright, let's see it!"

The other guy walks up to the cutie and says, "Hi, my name's Dave, and my doctor just told me that if I didn't get a blowjob from a blond within three hours, the disease I have will kill me in, oh, let's see now, 22 minutes!"

She looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said, "You mean I could save you from dying right now?" Then she says, "Pull it out!"

Ten minutes later, the two men were laughing and patting old Dave on the back when his friend noticed the blond sitting in the alley bawling her eyes out!

So he walks over to her and says, "I would have thought you would be so happy for saving my friend's life?!"

So she looks up at him just crying her eyes out even worse and says, "I could have saved my dad!"