Friends jokes

Stalker

    • So today I heard a friend say she had a stalker. I can confirm I've never seen a stalker following her.

  • 2

    • Pill

    • Teacher: Kids, what are some things you have that make you happy? Kid 1: I have my family to make me happy. Kid 2: I have my friends to make me happy. Teacher: What about you, Sean? Sean: I have to take pills to make me happy...

  • 25

    • Dream

    • Last night I shared a bed with two of my friends because we were in a small hotel. We had strange dreams last night.

    My friend on the left dreamed of getting a handjob.

    So did my friend on the right.

    I had a dream of skiing.

  • 1

    • Dad

    • What's the difference between me and my mate...

    I left my dad, while hers left with their friend Cancer.

  • 1
    • Friends memes

    Parent

    • Why does Johnny Sins cover his pants, but it doesn't work?

    Because the long, hard thing can't chirp down.

    Tell it to your parents and friends!

  • 1

    • Poetry

    • In the realm of poetry's grace, Where words dare to embrace, A request comes with a quirky plea, To give life to what the eyes may see.

    "Pussy lussy cussy," it begins, A playful phrase that surely spins, And though the words may raise a smile, Let's craft a verse that goes the extra mile.

    In free verse, we'll dance and sway, Allowing thoughts to have their say, For poetry knows no bounds or rules, It's a canvas for expression, where freedom fuels.

    But let's remember, dear friend, To keep our words kind and lend, Respect to all, in every line, For poetry's power can truly shine.

    So, let's journey on this poetic quest, With words that honor and truly impress, For in the realm of art and verse, We find beauty, in each line immersed.

    And though "Pussy lussy cussy" may make us smile, Let's seek inspiration that runs deep, mile after mile, For poetry's magic lies in its ability, To touch hearts, souls, and set thoughts free.

    In this short verse, may you find delight, As we paint with words, both bold and light, So let us write, with grace and art, A poem that sings straight from the heart.

  • 1

    • Julius Caesar

    • You travel to the past into the era where Julius Caesar is still alive. He thinks you may be from the future to bring him good news. He asks you, "How do I die?"

    You reply with: "Surrounded by friends."

  • 5

    • Orphan

    • Peter: *curses*

    Sam: Wow, do you kiss your mom with that mouth?

    Peter: Jokes on you, I don't have a mom.

    Tony: *having a heart attack* AFSJDHFKJJD Peter, we talked about this!!!

  • 0

    • Ketchup

    • I watched a movie with a lot of ketchup on the ground.

    I don't know why my friends look disgusted.

    Friend

    • My friend and I joined a french fry eating contest, but I just couldn't ketchup. So we switched to cheeseburgers, but I still couldn't mustard up the speed to lettuce win. I mayo not have thought this through.

    So we switched to fruits, but when it got to the watermelons, I started to feel a little green. My friend couldn't seed the point of us continuing anymore. I just couldn't digest the stress, I guess! :D

  • 0

    • Watersharky

    • There has to be someone that hates watersharky. He curses at you if you say one thing about his friends or him. He just is mean and needs to leave.