Friends jokes

My friend is an emo. I asked why he wears black. He said, "Black like my soul." I just walked away.

You are like Papa.

Friends don't lie.

My emo friend got jealous when my phone died.

Me: What do you call an orphan?

Friend: Homeless.

What do you call a group of emo kids? Suicide squad.

My friend said not to look down on me. I said I can't because I'm shorter than her.

Why didn't the orphan play video games with his friends?

Because his parents wouldn't let him.

You're so fat that when you go on a walk with your friends, it looks like they are orbiting you.

My friend died. Me and my other bestie start singing the coffin song. My bestie in the coffin, why are you not sad? Why are you still alive?

My friends' titties are bigger than my sakuras.

My friend asked for something dark and creamy. I said..... "GU KHA".

My crush's best friend came up to me and called me my crush's dog 🐕, so then I say, "Wow, you're an ass for calling me a bitch." He then looks at me wide-eyed, and I just walk away.

It's important to have a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between "antidote" and "anecdote," one of my best friends would still be alive.

Who's Paul Walker's close friend?

Tree.

Boy: "Why can't you get a family?"

Me: "Why can't you get a rope?"

Boy: "What do you mean?"

Friend and me: "We can show you."

Me: "I will tie the rope."

Friend: "I will push the chair."

When I died, my friend said he'd cover me.

Person: My left ear is ringing.

Friend: Then answer it!

My best friend is an orphan, and we try to have sleepovers, but his parents never say yes.

One day I visited my friend in a hospital.

I remember when I spoke, "You know, sometimes it's reaching its peak and its lowest state, but I know you'll always end like the others at calming and straight!"

Yes, I talked about the heart monitor beside him.

What's the best way to tell your friend you hate them? Option 1: Kill them. Option 2: Walk away. Option 3: Kill each other.

Me: Why can't I just kms and leave them the pain?