Food jokes
Why did the Roman eat pizza? He felt like it.
My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...
So I threw a coconut at her.
Why are eggs bad at puns?
They always mix up their yolks!
Question: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Answer: Because they taste funny!
Two nuts were walking down the street, and one was a-salted!
Cereal.
Today, I saw my friend go crazy eating her ham sandwich. When she went to the bathroom, I checked inside her ham sandwich, and there were fresh drugs.
What is the biggest candy in the world?
Candy Borobudur.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
One day my friend said: "I want tacos from Katie's, you?" and I said no thanks and she left. I never saw her again. Today I remember that I saw her name on TV as one of the victims of suicide, then I remember her and my motto: "If I'm dying, you're dying with me, you got no choice." I NEVER ate tacos from Katie's again.
Why is it always cold in the hospital?
To keep the vegetables fresh.
My bro said food was cool. So I threw a piece of cool chicken at him. For some reason, he hit me, OOF.
Did you hear they made an Emo-Hipster pizza?
It cuts itself, and you're supposed to eat it before it's cool.
What's the hardest part about making vegetable stew?
Trying to get the wheelchair to fit into the pot.
What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common?
By the time you're done with the breasts and the thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.
Stephen Hawking is intelligent.
He is not as green as he is cabbage.
Orphans would be upset if they went to FamilyMart.
'Cause they sell oden, not a family.
What do you call Autistic kids baking?
"Downies" with brownies.
What did the Buddhist say to the pizza delivery boy?
"Make me one with everything."
What's up with airline food?