How do you fix a broken pizza? With tomato paste.
Why do orphan kids never eat homemade food because they don’t even have one
I had a very long dream that I was eating the most juiciest, tastiest meal I'd ever eaten in my life. Then when I woke up, my wife was gone.
What cookies did the orphans never try?
Home made cookies!
What do you call an ex eating Taco Bell?
Explosion.
What do you call a dog in China?
E10
Why did the Twin Towers order from Just Eat?
They wanted some plane fries.
I like my humans like I like my chicken... Fully cooked.
What is 6 inches and long?
A Slim Jim.
Me: I wouldn’t want to be with a shitmate.
Shitmate: You’re so shitable.
Me: Bring banana ice cream.
Shitmate: Never happening.
I drip when you take me in the mouth, what am I? Ice cream.
What do cannibals call newborn babies?
Fresh fruit.
I got fired from the M&M Factory because I sorted out the W's.
"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"
"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."
"I meant the ice cream, bro..."
You're so fat you sunk Captain Crunch's ship.
You're so fat your blood type is Nutella.
Boy, if you don't get your "I'm Burger King with my Burger Queen!"
Depression jokes is like food...not every people get it
This kinda reminds me of when my mum was feeding me. She always used to say, "Open wide for the delicious plane."
Why can't an Asian play baseball?
'Cause they always eat the bat!
What do you get if you cross an avocado and a Glock?
Glockamole.
