Food jokes
Next time you get a call from anybody, say, "Hi, welcome to Dave's orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?"
Or,
"Hi, welcome to Pizza and Abortion clinic, your loss is our sauce!"
Before I die, I'm going to ask to be cremated.
Then I'm going to eat a bunch of popcorn kernels.
Then I'll die and get cremated. BOOM! I'm popcorn!
An Autistic chef made hamburgers out of donkey meat.
He called them: “ASPERGER’S”
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
Why can’t orphans eat cereal with milk? Cause mummy never gave them some.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
'Cause mommy never gave them some.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple got chosen.
You scream, I scream, we all scream for ice cream!
What did the tiger say to the bunny?
Nice to meat you!
Why did the baker give the shopper a butt? Because she asked for buns!
Why did the baker give the shopper a butt? Because she asked for a butt!
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
What is Hitler's favorite food? A hindenburger.
How did the cheetah greet other animals?
Cheetah: "Nice to eat you."
Guy: Are you a vending machine? Because you're a snack.
Girl: Your card got declined.
Guy: That's ok, you got to bang them a few times to get you money's worth.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
What does a nosy pepper do? Gets JALAPEÑO BUSINESS!
Slapped cheese on my white friend, told him I like cheese on my crackers.
Pizza Hut.
What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator door was opened? Close the door, I'm dressing.