Feel jokes

If you feel a lump in your rice, you fucked up.

If you feel a lump in your skin, you have cancer.

The other day someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.

Like, if you hate wearing a mask.

Every time I'm out in public, and I see someone without their mask, I always feel like there is something extra special about them. Then I realize that I can see all their face!

True story by the way.

A man and a boy went into a forest. The boy said he was scared. The man said, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone."

Do you ever get that feeling where you're just going through a school parking lot, then you realize that there are no parking lots?

I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t feel like screaming.

How did the flapjack feel when syrup was drizzled on him?

Butter.

Uranus be like, "Oh look, I'm Uranus. Imagine how disgusted I feel."

You ever get the feeling when your parents are cheating on you? I do.

He do American feel like Trump is the president, he is stupid like soup.

What makes a software developer feel rich?

Their cache.

What goes in and comes out and makes you feel good but isn't sexual?

(Insulin)

Girl lol feel dick in mouth on you.

If you're feeling numb, use your thumb.

It's fucked up how people make these jokes, and when orphans read them, it makes them feel worse about themselves. I should know, I'm an orphan.

You know how 6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9?

Well, how do you think 10 feels being in the middle of 9 11?

How did the person feel when his partner wouldn't perform a golden shower on him? Pissed off.

When I was feeling suicidal, I called the suicide hotline and they left me hanging.

I saw a girl with blond hair. She was sexy and beautiful. I thought she was the most hottest girl I ever saw, so I ran up to her feeling hot.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, In your presence, my love, Every moment feels new.