The reason Stephen Hawkings died is probably because he feel off his wheelchair, and he must've pressed shut down by accident.
What does a blowjob from a 80 year old and Bungee jumps have in common?
You feel the rush but don't look down
stop ruining the jokes its called worst jokes ever for a reason we all feel bad for orphans but people like dark humor and joke about everyone so quit being offended plz
Wanna know what my favorite feeling is? Warmth. Fuck I left the oven on!
Me:Sister STOP STEALING MY STUFF OR I WILL MAKE U FEEL BAD Sister:No I wont stop Me:Fine im telling the world what u did Sister:What you will see when i post it Sister:WHY DID U TELL THEM I PEED ON SANTA CLAUS WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD ME:BECAUSE U DON ́T HAVE A LIFE
What will reddit be without the robot logo?
RedDOT.
(btw im an ugly sack, feel free to dislike this retarded joke. i like bully people cuz their jokes are stupid, and my jokes are cooler than their jokes.)
These are not funny those that are Adopted feel hurt by these! You shall feel ashamed of yourself! Take the L! - Losers
My willy was feeling itchy so I decided to go to the doctor. My doctor was foreign, and spoke Spanish with and Argentinian accent. As I returned home, I noticed my willy was gone! Pessi stole my PENis thinking it was a Penalty just so he could statpad. SHAME ON YOU
Your eyebrows could make the bushes outside feel jealous.
What did the mouse say after it's bath?
"I feel squeaky clean!
There are days I feel really bad for my Wife. She has to feed me in the same place I take a dump. She really hates it when I spit my food back out. Stephen Hawking
dad: hey son do you like Christmas? 12 year old me: yeah! dad: well how would you feel about two me: what?
I'm like a rubber because people hit me as i cant feel
Why did the pony have to gargle? Maybe because he was feeling a little hoarse.
If Emma feel had a penny every time someone gave her header she she would have enough to make Mark Zuckerberg and trump her third legged bitch.
Good Evening Twitter, this is your boy EatDatPussy445, and about like 30-45 minutes ago, I beat the fuck out of my dick so god damn hard that I can't even feel my left leg, my left leg has went totally numb. And, my dick has also went totally numb, to the point where it feels fucking weird when I go and take a piss.
heres a list of puns not all of them are mine
1.Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.
2.Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.
4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
5.Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
6.Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!
7.Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
8.How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
9.That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
10.My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!
