Favorite jokes
What's a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross country.
What’s a cannibal's favorite takeaway shop?
The orphanage.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite childhood song? "The wheels on the chair go round and round....."
If Mexico is an unredeemable shithole, then how come the Republicans' favorite senator, Ted Cruz, ran to Mexico as fast as he could after a little bit of snow in his home?
What is a necrophiliac's favorite band?
Coldplay.
What's a lesbian's favorite type of food?
Finger-food.
What is Wacko Jacko's favorite David Bowie song?
"Boys Keep Swinging."
What is the favorite dish in Africa? The empty one.
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite piano note? A minor.
Q: What's an orphan's favorite part of a website?
A: The homepage.
My favorite sex position is ‘WOW.’ It's where I flip your mom upside down.
What's a skeleton's favorite plant? A bone-zai tree. But if they don't like that one, how about a s-pine tree?
What is a suicide pack's favorite song?...
Let the bodies hit the floor.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal?
His shoulder.
What is the Titanic's favorite mint?
Icebreakers.
What's Thanos' favorite game?
Half-life.
- The emo went to give the tree a high five, but the emo was left hanging.
- How did the gay person die? Homicide.
- Why did the emo get kicked out of the amusement park? He was cutting in line.
- When does a joke turn into a dad joke? When it leaves and never comes back.
- I cried when my dad chopped onions. Onions was such a good dog.
- I have happy memories building sandcastles with my dad, until my mom took his urn away.
- How is the person over there different from cancer? His dad didn't beat cancer.
What was the favorite game in 2001? Flight simulator.
My favorite toast for parties:
May I be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows I'm dead.
What was Osama Bin Laden's favorite drink?
A Double Manhattan.