Father's jokes
Did I ever tell you my father should have been on the plane that crashed into the Twin Towers?
But that's just my opinion.
Why do orphans go to church?
They have someone to call "father" there.
Why does an orphan have to go to church? Because that's the only way he can pray for a father.
Son: Dad, what's a morbid joke?
Father: Walk over to a homeless man and throw a rock at him, then you will know.
Son: But Dad, I don't have arms or legs.
Father: Now you know.
Johny Sin's son checked his father's folder of p*rn in his laptop.
and found that in all the videos his father is...
Did yall know this?
What's the difference between my dad and cancer?
Cancer doesn't leave.
Little Johnny walks into the living room and asks his parents, "Mom, Dad, what do you get when you crossbreed a bulldog and shih tzu?"
The mother and father shrug and say, "We have no idea, Johnny. What do you get?" and little Johnny replies, "You get a bullshit."
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your mom's house.
Knock knock.
You: Who's there?
Your new father!
A kid and his dad went to the park. The kid accidentally steps on a cockroach.
They go home immediately and dad gets the scissors. Now the kid has some balls to play with.
Why do orphans go to church?
So at least they will have someone to call father.
What did the father name his daughter with no legs?
Peggy.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?
Because they don’t have a “mother’s” or “father’s” day!
A priest says to me, "Come up, my child." Then I said, "Do I know you? Because you're not my father."
Why did the orphan go to church?
So he had someone to call Father.
Orphan: Throws a boomerang.
Boomerang: Comes back with his father.
Father: Goes to get milk.
Your manna so fat your father will be coming around the mountain when he cums.
Rhydon- son.
Rhydon? - mum.
RHYDON DEEZ NUTS! - son.
Jeez, ur like ur father in bed- mum.
XD
A baby and his father are sitting in a street cafe. A woman bends over to pick up her keys just as a gust of wind blows up the woman's dress. "va va voom," the baby says. The dad chuckles and says, "Yes. I'd like to have sex with her too."
Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?
I heard there was a kidnapping.
Don't worry, he woke up in the back of a van.
It was his father's friend who was a priest.
He was just bringing him to church.