Fat jokes

"SCOOT WANT TAXI!" Ok, maybe I do but can't make it there because yo mama is so fat he can't hear me on the other side.

When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say, “This boy always had a fat ass.”

Yo mama so fat, when she joined NASA, they put her in orbit and the next day there was a lunar eclipse.

What do you call a fat, ugly, and hairy woman with a rape whistle? A feminist.

Alfonso's mom is so fat that she stepped on the scale and the doctor said, "Oh shit, that's my phone number!"

Tell a woman she’s beautiful a hundred times, and she won’t believe you.

Tell a woman she’s fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life.

If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?

What is the difference between a feminist and a gorilla? One of them is fat and hairy, while the other one has a functional brain (the gorilla, of course).

You're so fat the only letters of the alphabet you know are K, F, and C.

Your mom is so fat that when she fell on the sidewalk, nobody laughed, but the sidewalk cracked up.

If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?

What did the fat man say as he entered Nagasaki?

Nothing, he just exploded.

Yo mama so fat, I saw her eat with 3 utensils: A spoon, a knife, and a FORKLIFT.

Holy shit there's so many yo mama jokes. Here's mine: Yo mama so skinny she used a cheerio as a hula hoop.

Yo mama so fat that she made a plane unstable and crashed it into the Twin Towers.

Yo mama so old that she has Jesus's autograph.

Yo mama so ugly that not even makeup can save her.

Yo mama so dumb that she thought Rocket League was a competition between kids in wheelchairs.

Why are Japanese always so skinny?

Cause last time there was a fat man, an entire city disappeared.

A fat girl was dancing on the table, and I said, "Nice legs." She says, "You really think so?" And I say, "Yes, definitely, most tables would have been broken by now."

What do you call a serial killer that only kills fat people?

A mass murderer.

What do you call a fat transgender midget?

Jigglypuff.

Why do you call a fat midget?

Jiggly Puff.

Joe mama so fat she went wearing high heels and came back in flip flops.