Family jokes
Person: You suck!
Me: Tell that to your mom, and she’ll say the same thing, honey. 😎
What do you say to the orphan?
"Shut up, get a mom and dad!"
Your mama's so ugly that when she looks in the mirror, you can see Micah.
Why do orphans become criminals?
So they can become wanted for once.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Your mom." "Your mom who?" "It's not your mom, it's my mom!"
"No Way Home" is just the life of an orphan.
We better stop telling orphan jokes because their parents will get mad. Oh... wait... never mind.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because it can never find home.
Mommy, Mommy, are you an archer?
"Shut up and keep the apple on your head still."
Brother 2: We have these weird circles on the street! Government is tracking us!!!
Brother 1: They are just to sense cars so they can change lights. And it's the government.
Brother 2: Then why are there two in the left turn lane?
Brother 1: So one car isn't always going left and stopping the others.
Brother 2: Then why are they one car apart? Oh, to have three people going.
Brother 1: Correct. When I see one car on the first, I go on the second so my light changes.
Brother 2: You monster.
Brother 1: I wonder if they trigger by weight?
Brother 2: HA. Yo mama would trigger the sensor.
Brother 1: ARG. It's OUR MAMA you're disrespecting.
Mother (brother 1): What's going on boys? *looks in mirror* HOLY SH@& SHE IS PRETTY!
Brother 2: I think you should take your pills.
Brother 1: Found them.
*imaginary mother and brother fade away*
Thank you ELECTROBOOM for inspiring this joke/sh!t. Go subb to him.
Btw the (1) means it is just imaginary brother one acting like another brother.
What should you never say to an orphan?
"Your Mom."
Brother: Your eyebrows look hella bad.
Sister: I don’t even think you know what eyebrows are supposed to look like because you have none.
Why can’t orphans fly? Because they’re still winging it.
My son always said he wanted to skydive, so we went on a plane, and mid-flight, we had to jump out. The only issue is we were on a commercial flight to Arizona.
Why are orphans sad?
Don't ask, or their parents may... oh wait, carry on.
How do you know an orphan is lying? When they swear on their mother's life.
When someone said to an orphan, "My boyfriend ghosted me," the orphan says back, "Don't worry, my parents ghosted me!" 🤣
Joe Mama so dumb, I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it is still printing.
Why can't orphans get five stars in GTA? Because they weren't wanted.
What is an orphan's least favorite store?
Family Dollar, they just can’t seem to find one.