Family jokes
I fed a vegan cock. No, not chicken, no, not my cock, my dead dad's.
Why do orphans love dogs?
Because dogs stay with them.
(True story)
One day Sally's mom said, "I can just eat you up!" And Sally says, "No, you can't!" Then the mom asks why and Sally says, "Because I'm a beaner, and we don't taste good."
What do you call an orphan who can't get 5 stars on GTA?
Not wanted.
This midget in my school has two moms. I said, "Did your dad go get the milk?" He told me to shut up. I said, "I don’t shut up, I grow up like you should."
Memes
HERE ARE MY DOGS
My sister said I was only allowed to grate cheese, so I said to her that I’d prove her wrong.
The next day my mum asked me why my cheese was tan, and I said it was my own special recipe. My mum loved the cheese but she didn’t like it much after the funeral.
Why is everyone trying to make a big deal out of this? My family were only flying to Pakistan and crashed into 2 towers.
Why can't orphans have a Christmas list? Because they can't give it to their parents to tell Santa.
Why did the orphan live at school?
Because on the first day his parents didn’t pick him up.
Your mom was born in a dumpster, as well as you.
What can't an orphan spell?
Home.
Son, why do I not have an Easter basket?
Mom, you're 23, you don't need one. Ends calls, child support.
What show can the orphan relate to... Full House.
When your mom tells you to stop playing on the computer, you say, "Foot you!"
I dated an orphan and then later married him for 7 years until he told me he was an orphan.
Fuck you and your shitty family!
Why do orphans have no parents?
Because they are so fucking useless!
Bro, if you think about it, your mom and God have one thing in common... They're both big.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
"Orphans get picked."
What is the similarity between Hitler and orphans?
They both don't have parents.