Family jokes
Two skeleton brothers are talking.
1st bro: "Hey, get up! You and do some exercise! You are so heavy, you weigh a ton!"
2nd bro: "A skele-TON :)"
What's the difference between an escaped prisoner and an orphan?
Only one is wanted.
What do an orphan's father and Nemo have in common?
They are both nowhere to be found.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
What do you call a hillbilly girl who's faster than her brothers?
A redneck virgin.
Why did the transgender girl want to be a boy?
Because momma never raised no pussy.
A cemetery should be built next to orphanages, so the orphans can see their parents.
I got my little girl a hand sewing kit for her birthday and she cried. I didn't understand why until I realized that she had no hands to sew with.
Kid: Dad, I want Santa to give me an iPhone.
Indian poor dad: Son, Santa is deaf.
Kid: No, he is not. I saw him on TV yesterday.
Indian poor dad: Oh, actually, I asked him for a new wife. Maybe he is wearing AirPods.
Kid: You are my Santa, daddy.
Indian poor dad: Pull down your pants, son.
Kid: It's not an Apple product.
Indian poor dad: It's a banana.
I can’t watch anime anymore when my friend’s grandpa is in the house.
He hasn’t heard a Japanese person scream since the war.
An orphan was running down the road. A car pulled up and said, "Get in." So the orphan got in and said, "Where are we going?" The kidnapper said, "I'm taking you to my house." The orphan replied, "OML, ARE YOU ADOPTING ME!?"
A father and a son were painting pictures together. The son and father were drawing the exact same thing to a T, and the son said, "What happened to your hand?" looking at the scar tissue near the father's knuckle. The father replied with, "You know what happened, you were there." The son continues to deny this until they both finish their paintings. They're exactly the same.
The father passes out for a few hours and wakes up to find that there's only one painting.
How are orphans and blind kids similar?
They both have never seen their parents :)
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home, there were signs everywhere.
My sister's boyfriend is mad at me because I fucked his girl.
Yo mama so fat that she was born on the 3rd, 4th, and 5th of March.
Orphan: "Why can’t I watch a PG movie?"
Me: "They are Parental Guidance."
Why does Sally have 100 sisters? She lives in an orphanage.
So, apparently, Hitler's dad was quite the abusive fellow, always beating his son.
Guess that's why he's called (Hit)ler.
I was told to burn calories, so I threw your mom in the fire.