Family jokes
What's an orphan's favorite football game?? The homecoming.
Why do all orphans buy an iPhone X?
Because they have no home button.
Why didn't the orphan go home?
Because he didn't have a home.
Why can't orphans go to school? They need their parents to sign them up.
My grandfather told me I'm too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
Kris
Damn this shit!
Megan Thee Stallion: What!
Kris: My mother is a fucker!
The whole world:
OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Son: Dad, how was I born?
Dad: Your mum's a hoe.
Son: OK, what's a hoe?
Dad: Your mum.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
There was once a small earthquake, but when I got outside, I realized my brother was still stuck inside. When I told my mom, she just said, "It doesn't matter, you're my favorite anyway!"
An orphan walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey, bum, bum, bum, got a family?"
Why can't an orphan roleplay? Because they don't have parents.
A sister went to her brother's room and says,
"I'm scared, can I sleep with you?"
"Yes, sis."
"What is this?" (pointing at his dick)
"My pet snake."
"Can I pet it?"
"Yes."
He wakes up in a hospital.
"What happened?"
"Your snake spit on me, so I bit his head off."
"You dummy!"
"Whaaat?"
Parent: Have you seen your sister?
Son: No, the last time I saw her was when we were playing hide and seek.
Did you know that your son has been deeper inside of your wife than you have...unless you put the coat hanger up there?
Me and my wife love playing table tennis. I couldn’t win all day, but when it got dark, I managed to beat her. I don’t know how the police found out so quickly.
Once I said to an orphan, "What the 'F' means in 'orphan'?"
He replied, "There's no 'F'."
Me: "There's no family."
My dad died in 9/11.
He was a good pilot.
Has anyone walked in on their parents making love? I have.
Please comment! :)
Why do orphans love Christmas?
Because they build a home.
What's orphans favorite game to play?
GTA5 because they want to be wanted!