Family jokes

What do you say when your brother has too many jeans?

"Gene-ious!"

Son: I heard mom got stung by a few bees this morning. Is she ok? Hospital?

Dad: She's ok now, no hospital.

Dad: She had to take the deep penis.

Son: Umm...... WHAT!?

Dad: I had to inject her with an EPIC PENIS.

Dad: Oh for god's sakes.

Dad: Epi Pen.

There was once a boy who took a selfie, and the next day became an orphan.

If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

I was dying when I called my sister and she said, "Hi, this is Pepperoni's pizza and abortion clinic; your loss, our sauce. How may I help you today?"

There is someone in my class named Henry Rocket Rueben, and he always says he rockets into my mom.

My mom told me to get dressed, and I said, "For what? Are we going to the rodeo?"

Why did the orphan go outside the school?

Answer: Because it was take your parents to school day.

din mamma

There are 2 dads and 2 sons. They all caught a fish.

Why did they only come home with 3 fish?

(Answer)

There were a grand-dad, dad, and son.

If you don't get it, then it means grand father is the dad to the dad (1 dad). Dad is the dad for the son and a son for the grandfather. Get it?

The orphan had to earn money because he/she didn't have parents to give him/her an allowance.

I asked my mom if I was adopted. She said no, "Why the fuck would I adopt you?" and I said "I'm gonna kill myself," and she also said, "Make sure you do it right this time."

My sister said to kill myself, so now I’m in the hospital hoping to die.

If orphans aren’t religious, they really have no father. 😂

When you're angry, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Why can't the orphan go on a field trip?

Because he can't sign the parent's signature.

Kid: Dad, where do you work?

Dad: I.C.U.P.

Kid: HAHAHAH!!!! See you pee.

What does a baby computer call its father? Data.

You want to hear a joke?

Your mom.

At 6, she wanted a happy mama.

At 8, she hated acting like a mom.

At 10, she wanted to see her own smile again.

At 11, she wanted to see her mom.