Family jokes
What do you call an 18 year old orphan?
Homeless.
Yo mama is so fat, she can’t even fit in the suitcase.
What's the difference between a boomerang and your dad?
Boomerangs come back.
Sometimes I feel ugly, but then I think of my sister.
My son caught me masturbating the other day and was like, "Dad, what are you doing?" I said, "Don't worry, you'll be doing it soon." He said, "Why is that?" I told him, "My arm is getting tired."
My little sister that is 10 is so ugly her hairline can't even be found by Dora the Explorer.
What’s the difference between a robber and an orphan?
One is wanted.
I was raised as an only child.
Which really annoyed my twin sister.
I just wanted to say to never let go of family; they are everything. Never let anyone walk all over you. And if you are with me, like this quote.
Orphans are human, too! They just don't know who their parents are or where! I know four sisters named Mariah, Kariah, Lariah, and Iariah and they said they are orphans, too! And they are sad and they don't like your jokes!
Q: What's an orphan's favorite part of a website?
A: The homepage.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t have a home to run to.
Little Johnny was told by his friend that if you go to your parents and say: "I know the truth," they give you money.
So Little Johnny says to his mum, "I know the truth," so his mum hands him 20 dollars and tells him not to tell anyone. So when Little Johnny’s dad gets home, Little Johnny says, "I know the truth." His dad hands him $50 and says not to tell anyone. So Little Johnny tries it on the postman and says, "I know the truth," and the postman says, "Come here, son."
What do you call an orphan who likes football?
Because someone will actually give him something.
My Dad: Son, history always repeats itself.
Me: So you're gonna leave me again?
I'm such a good babysitter because the last person I babysat was so flat.
Why do orphans not like jokes?
Because they hate your "mom" and "dad" joke because they miss their parents. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I was making a bet with my grandfather about who would die first. I said that I would die first.
He said "Bet" and died after he drank his coffee.
He was my least favorite grandparent.
Dad, why are we here?
Because you're not loved.
Why couldn't the orphan buy chips?
They were all family sized.