Dad: Hey son, do you like Christmas?
12 year old me: Yeah!
Dad: Well, how would you feel about two?
Me: What?
Son: Hey dad, why is my name Canada?
Dad: Because you were made there.
Mum: We haven't been to Canada.
Dad: Hol' up a minute.
My sister asked where is my book.... me: "itti badi nak hai gufa jaisi dhund us mei."
Mommy, why is my name Brick???
Mom: When you were a little baby, a brick dropped on your head.
Mommy, why is my name Rose???
Mom: When you were a little baby, a rose petal dropped on your head.
Brick walks in, "Blagudnunag."
I was on a plane and my mom said, "It's just a little turbulence."
And I said, "Mom, we just got on the runway!"
Who are you?
Oh, I'm an orphan!
Oh... bye! :/
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Orphan.
Orphan who?
Are you my mommy?
10 dicks up your mom's ass!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is!
Why can’t an orphan celebrate Father’s Day and Mother’s Day? Because they have no parents.
Why did the Orphan have imaginary parents?
Because his last parents existed.
Why can’t an orphan hit a home run? Because he doesn’t have a home.
Children are so ungrateful nowadays. I got my daughter a bike, but now she’s crying on the floor saying, “I don’t have legs!”
Why do orphans have to be homeschooled?
Because they can't be home schooled.
My brother Taf likes to pee the bed.
There are days I feel really bad for my Wife. She has to feed me in the same place I take a dump.
She really hates it when I spit my food back out.
Q: What is the difference between a dead body and an orphan?
A: The dead body had a family.
Yo mamma is so dumb, she will watch Disney Junior all night long.
When the card declines on child insurance.
There was a house with a three-story building.
The first one had Mexicans.
The second one had Africans.
The third one had white people.
An earthquake came.
But who did survive?
The white family because they were at work.
