Why don't orphans watch TV?
Because of "Family Guy."
Family Jokes
What’s an orphan’s least favorite shoe?
Fuller House😂
Why do orphans live on the street?
They don't have parents to put a roof over their head.
My mom said, "Don't jump off, we need you."
I said, "No," then I jumped off a building and died.
What's an orphan's dream job?
A builder, to build themselves a home.
What's an orphan's favorite battle zone? The home front.
I wasn’t close to my dad when he died. It’s a good thing he stepped on a land mine.
Why do orphans love to go to church?
Because they can finally call someone "father!"
Why are orphans lucky?
Because when they drive, they don’t need a license plate, because they don’t have a home.
What kind of flower do orphans use? Self-raising.
What did the orphan's mum say before she abandoned her child?
OH it's a bitch.
I had an uncle who was a conductor. He wasn’t a symphony conductor, nor was he a street car conductor, nor was he a train conductor. He was struck by lightning.
Coach: Why can't orphans play baseball?
Me: Because they can't get a homerun.
Q: What movie do orphans hate?
A: Fatherhood.
What do an orphan and a homeless person have in common?
They have no one to call "Dad."
Why can't orphans sign up for sports?
They have to have a parent's signature.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Q: I often think I'm ugly, but then I think of my sister and get over it.
My dad walked in on me having sex with a dog. She gasped and shouted at me, "Get out of here, it's my turn!"
You should always be happy about family and love.
