Family jokes
Your mom said I was ugly. I told her she couldn’t see her belly button because she was so fat. She said, “I thought I was the only one without one!”
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
What's a man's favorite thing that starts with "m" and ends with "arriage?"
Miscarriage.
Your mom wants to tell you that you're adopted, but you were an orphan.
Why can't an orphan go on a field trip?
'Cause they need parent registration!
Memes
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.
What's the difference between an orphan's life and a knife?
A knife has a point.
My sister was hitting on my boyfriend. I'm 11, she's 9. She said, "Go f-ck yourself," so I said, "Okay, thanks for the idea!"
What do you call your sister who only has one leg?
Ei-lean.
Yo mama is Dora.
Are the three little pigs orphans because their mom kicked them out of the house?
What do you call a white girl that can run faster than her brothers? A redneck virgin.
What did my dad say before he went to go get milk?
"There's money in my wallet for pizza. I love you."
What do you call your sister if she only has one leg?
Ei-lean.
Why can’t orphans build computers?
They don’t know where to put the motherboard.
A kid asks his mom what dark humor is.
She says, “You see that man with no arms, tell him to clap.”
“But mom, I’m blind!” says the kid.
“Exactly,” replied the mom.
Nothing bad ever happens to the Kennedys! Except that one headshot, but we don’t talk about that.
I turned the light on, and my dad said turn it off, so I unplugged his life support.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he doesn't know where home is.
My friend's dad went to jail. He's just surprised because he can finally find him!