Family jokes
Mom: Please eat, baby!
Baby: No!
Mom: Here comes the airplane!
I have no dad, no milk, and no mom, so that means no tits, like if you can relate.
I saw a girl crying. I asked her where her parents were, and she started to cry even more.
Man, I love working in the orphanage.
Son: What's for dinner tonight?
Mom: Steak!
Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?
Mom: HUNGER!
Q: Why can kids relate to dogs?
A: They are noticed for 13 years, then left for no one to touch again.
Why do orphans love going to church?
Because they can call someone "father."
Why are adopted kids better than bio kids? Because their parents actually wanted them.
What did the orphan poker player say to the elder?
“Will you raise me?”
Yo mama's so old, her social security number is one.
What's an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it's the only thing that comes back.
What do you call a straight orphan?
A no homeo.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I saw your mom beat you.
Maybe we should stop talking about orphans, their parents will get ma... oh wait.
What's the similarity between an orphan and my dick?
They both will die alone.
What is the difference between an Apple and an orphan?... One always gets picked.
Sister, you're ugly.
Other sister: I'm not your reflection.
PS. Sorry if it is not funny.
I asked my kid to give me a hand. That motherfucker cried while charging his mechanical arm.
Yo momma's so ugly that when she walked into a Haunted Mansion, she walked back out with a job application.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Your dead son.
Your hairline dates so far back like when your dad left.