Family jokes
Two mums hook up!
Their daughter comes in the room and says, "Which one's the baby daddy?"
The "mum" points to the woman who was actually a man!
Little Johnny said to his mate, "I bet I can make you swear." His mate said, "Good luck." So Johnny told his mate that he slept with his sister. His mate yelled, "I'm gonna fucking kill you!"
Why didn't the orphan go home?
Because he didn't have a home.
Alabama's saying: It's not cheating if we’re all siblings.
A sibling went up to their other sibling and said, "Dad said you're adopted."
The other sibling said, "You are, too."
Then the first sibling goes, "No, I'm not."
And the sibling says, "We're twins."
The other kid goes, "And you're adopted... oh."
what you get
Kid: What is between mom's legs?
Dad: Paradise.
Kid: What's between your legs?
Dad: The key to paradise.
Kid: Well, you better change the lock, the neighbor has the key to.
What is the difference between an orphan and a non-orphan? You can slap the orphan, but not the non-orphan because they can actually tell their parents.
A pastor asked his child what his favorite bible verse was... He responded, "Keep watch," because he wanted a watch.
What did Mother Mary say when God farted? Jesus Christ, you stink!
Why do kids like to pick on orphans?
Because they can't call their parents.
My mom told me a joke about boxing.
I guess I missed the punch line.
Why did the orphan get an iPhone X for his birthday?
Because the iPhone X doesn't have a home button.
If you're an orphan, it must be pretty hard taking "your mom" jokes.
The average human male walks for five miles, but the gas station is ten miles away. So why does it take fifteen years for my dad to buy cigarettes?
Why did the strawberry cry? -- Because his mother was in a jam.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year? Because there is no Mother's or Father's Day.
What's an orphan's least favorite game?
Hide and seek.
A kid annoyed me the other day. I told him to shut up and go back to his parents. That's the last time I'm going to an orphanage.
If you’re bored, punch an orphan.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
What do you call an orphan taking a picture with it's family?
A self-fie.