Family jokes
So things are just too tiring to sort out... like which adoption center you should send your son to?
Orphan: I'm hungry.
Dad: Let's go to KFC.
Orphan 2: Boy, you don't got a dad!
Why can orphans only watch G-rated movies?
Because they have no parental guidance.
What is the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?
One of them is picked.
Mom, where are we going?
To your grandma's funeral.
Yeah, 'cause I 360 no-scoped that b*tch in the face.
Memes
My ex's dad died while she was texting me. She said she had a boyfriend, but I told her I had a dad.
Why can't an orphan hit a home run?
He's got no home to run to.
Why did the orphan girl cry during sex?
Because her boyfriend said "Who's your daddy?"
BAJAHAHAHHAA
I just competed in a wrestling tournament. The first guy hit me harder than my dad’s belt.
Your mama's so young your dad went to jail.
Dad: Hey, uh... you're adopted.
Dog: *frown*
What is an orphan's least favorite store? Home Depot.
What's the difference between a puppy and an orphan?
Puppies get adopted.
Girl: Come over.
Orphan: I can’t.
Girl: My parents aren’t home.
Orphan: Oh, cool, something we have in common.
An orphan boy at my school did really badly on a test and started crying. I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”
What do you do if your dick is smoking?
Get your mum to lick it.
Your mum is so fat, all her relationships are long distance.
Your family is so poor, when you knocked on the door for money, I offered you a penny, and when you knocked again, the rock answered and knocked you out.
One man's trash is another man's treasure, he said when he found out his parents split up and he is being adopted.
Why can't orphans use iPhones?
They can't find the home button.