Family jokes
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Tell 'em to clap until their parents come home.
Riddle me this. Riddle me that.
Why did my parents never come back?
Why can't orphans have iPhones?
Because they can't find the home button.
What's the best thing about an orphan GF?
You don't have to meet her parents.
If aliens were real,
then orphans would finally have a home.
Memes
Mom: Kid, bring your toys and clothing to the car. We're going to Disney Land.
Kid: Ok.
*Bring kid to the orphanage*.
Why did the orphan wait in line?
To see their parents next.
What's the difference between an orphan and a puppy?
Parents enjoy the presents of a puppy.
Orphan: *crying* You: Do you know where your parents are? Orphan: No. Your Friend: They don't have parents!!! You: 😂 I know.
What is the difference between artificial vanilla and Marjorie Taylor Greene's children?
Artificial vanilla comes from a beaver's asshole, the children from an asshole's beaver.
Why do orphans like to go to church?
It is the only place where they can call a father.
Everybody is mad because that guy from Alberta punched a girl in a wheelchair.
I think he was upset because he found out his sister was cheating on him.
Teacher: Where is your slip so I can see you can come on this trip?
Orphan: Parent signature: ___________
When you met her first before your parents met each other. (In the case of your mom dating her dad).
Mother got shot, damn.
Father got shot, damn.
Sister got shot, damn.
Brother got shot, damn.
Auntie running away with a shotgun!
Kid to daddy: "Why do they call it Uranus?"
Daddy to kid: "Cause, son, it's Uranus."
Please help, my dad is an addict. He won't stop, and he eats my food.
Sometimes I think, should I kill him? But nah, he will go down with the others who did that too.
When your mom says, "Go to bed," but you reply with, "But Mom, I need help because it is inside, but we are outside."
What is an orphan's favorite video game?
"Who's Your Daddy?"
You: Knock knock. Other person: Who is there? You: Not your parents.