Family jokes
One day, there were three people: a mom and two kids. One of the kids walks up and asks her mom why she was named Rose. Her mom told her that she ate a rose petal when she was born; that is why she was named Rose.
Then the second child walked up and yelled, "Ahhhhhh!" and the mom said, "Shut up, Billy Goat!"
Guys stop before I tell my parents!
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan?
Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
Your mother.
A girl with no arms and one leg goes to her mother and asks: "Mom, next year for the carnival, can I dress up as a princess?"
The mother replies: "Why? Didn't you like the ice lolly dress from last year?"
Little Johnny goes to his mum and asks, "Mummy, what's rape?"
Little Johnny's mum answers, "The way you got here."
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
The apples get picked.
What does the orphan have in common with Batman? They both lost their parents.
What's the difference between a dead baby and a slice of pizza?
A dead baby can't feed a family.
One time the dog got bit by a snake, so my dad had to shoot it. My dad said to me, "This is what's going to happen to your little brother." "What little brother?" Exactly.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
What's one plus one?
Yo mama.
What’s an orphan's favorite drink?
Fosters.
One day I seen a little boy walking in the grocery store, so I asked if he was okay, and he said yes. I asked where his parents were, and he said his mom died years ago and his dad is stuck in the milk aisle.
My name is Mariah Carly Brown, and I am an orphan, and what do I say about your jokes that are not funny... STOP THEM!
Dark humor is mean! All day I go to see all the jokes I find, and I see "Orphan jokes."
What kind of sick person likes that kind of joke? By the way, it is not a question. I have 3 twin sisters! Lariah, Kariah, and Iariah! Iariah starts with an i! So stop the jokes, please!
Yo mama so old the carpenter uses her crotch as sandpaper.
I always enjoy family reunions.
It's always a good time meeting up with my exes.
Dentist: Open up, sir.
Me: So... I hate my life, my family, my sisters, my dog, my cat, and I tried to take a bath with my toaster, but my dog took it. That's why I hate my dog. And my cat died trying to chew my rope; it choked... Yea.
Dentist: I... meant your mouth... so I can clean your teeth.
Me: :O Ohhhh, my bad.
Dentist: Do you need help??
Me: Yep.
Dentist: ...
Me: ....
My uncle and I have somewhat of an awkward relationship. At times I find him a bit hard to swallow.
What makes a joke a dad joke? When it leaves and doesn't come back.