Family jokes
Why does an orphan play GTA to be wanted? 😂😭
Why do people always talk about nine eleven???
My dad died that day.
He was a good pilot.
My sister reminds me of 911: one moan of "OMG" got everyone's attention.
Q: Why can't orphans be gay?
A: They have no one to call "daddy."
There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. I love working at an orphanage.
Memes
Once upon a time, there was a woman named Sarah who woke up one morning to find her husband and his wheelchair missing. She searched high and low, but they were nowhere to be found. Desperate to find them, she put up posters all over town offering a reward.
My dad went to go buy milk, but he walks as slow as my grandmother.
My grandmother is paralyzed in the legs.
Orphans can get away with anything really bad at school, because they can't be sent home for it.
What is an orphan's excuse to leave a party?
"I'm gonna make like my parents and run."
Why can't orphans celebrate Christmas?
Father Christmas left them.
Why did the orphan cry when the teacher yelled at him?
Because the teacher said, "Don't make me call your parents!"
We were so poor when we were kids, dad used to jerk off the dog to feed the cat.
Grandpa said, "No phone near the table," so I said, "You're not allowed near the school."
I don't like the term "kidnapping." I prefer "surprise adoption."
Guys, stop telling orphan jokes, soon they're gonna tell they're par... oh wait, never mind, carry on.
Mom: Can I tell you a joke?
Kid: Sure.
Mom: Knock knock.
Kid: Who's there?
Mom: Not yo.
Kid: Not yo who?
Mom: Not yo father.
Kid: Not yo husband either.
I made an orphan website. It does not have a home page.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Do you know why orphans can't get married? Because they will never get their parents' blessing.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
I remember my dad's last words: "I met your father."