Family jokes
Why can you bully an orphan?
Because they can’t tell their parents.
You see a kid on the side of the street crying, so you go up to them and say, "Where are your parents?" The kid says, "What are parents?"
There is this little boy, and he gets in the shower with his mom and looks up and says, "Mommy, what are those?"
She replies with, "These are my headlights."
He looks down and says, "Mommy, what's that?" She says, "That's my garage."
So he gets out of the shower and gets in with his dad and looks down and says, "What is that?" The dad says, "This is my snake."
Later that night, he wakes up in the middle of the night and screams, "Mommy, Mommy, turn off your headlights and close your garage. Daddy's snake is trying to get in!"
What do you call Moby Dick's dad?
Papa Boner.
What is the difference between an orphan's dad and a boomerang?
Oh... one comes back.
Why doesn’t my bully get a dad joke? Oh, ya, ummm...
Your mom!
"Hola soy Dora, do you see Donald Trump? That’s right, he’s at my house, and he’s building a wall to separate me and Caillou. And Mami won’t let him, so she was walled alive!"
What's the best comeback for a person calling you an orphan?
Kill their parents.
All the people disliking these jokes are definitely orphans.
What do you call an orphan that grows up to be a priest?
Father-less.
What kind of flour do orphans use to make bread?
Self-raising.
When a boy points at his parents, they disappear.
What is the difference between an orphan and a cat?
The cat is actually cute.
We better stop telling orphan jokes because their parents will get mad. Oh... wait... never mind.
Why can't orphans play on a computer?
'Cause they have no motherboard.
Why do orphans do so well in life?
When people told them "Go big or go home," they only had one option.
Why do orphans always go to white vans when someone asks?
Because they want to feel wanted.
Why is an orphan's favorite movie Spider-Man: No Way Home?
What do orphans and apples not have in common... The apples get picked up.