Family jokes
You’re so fat,
that your family moved to the other side of the U.S.A., but they still see you.
Yo son so excellent, he gone to a Rubik’s cube competition who competed against his daddy.
Q. Why did the boy fall off his bike?
A. His mom threw an oven at him.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t run home.
Why do orphans like boomerangs so much?
Because they come back.
Kid: Hey, Mum, why are we pushing the car off the cliff?
Mum: Shut up, son, you’ll wake your father!
Why do black people call each other brothers? Because they don't know who their fathers are.
So, I accidentally just tipped over my paralyzed sister.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they can’t find home base.
Your mom and dad abandoned you because you're too ugly.
Your hairline is so fat that when you meet Santa, you're fatter than him and your mom.
Why do orphans play with boomerangs?
Because they come back.
When my family goes to weddings, my senior relatives tell me things like “You’re next!” So I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Mom, am I adopted?
What? No. "In head" No, dah, bitch.
What's the difference between a flower and an orphan?
One is allowed in the house.
Why are orphans good at dodgeball?
They can dodge adoptions.
Why do people adopt orphans?
They get cash.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can't find the home plate.
My bad, but you stink so bad you passed by a trashcan and it yelled, "Wow! I didn't know I had family!"
An orphan was running down the road. A car pulled up and said, "Get in." So the orphan got in and said, "Where are we going?" The kidnapper said, "I'm taking you to my house." The orphan replied, "OML, ARE YOU ADOPTING ME!?"