Family jokes
I told my mother I wanted a brother for Christmas. The next day, I saw her in the strip club across the street.
Your mum is so smart, but she still can’t figure out why she had you.
Why can’t orphans live?
They don’t have parents.
My sis said only garlic and onions can make you cry.
So I threw an orange at her.
Teacher: I used to be an orphan once.
Student: OOFT.
Teacher: Who are we missing?
Student: Your parents.
Best part about being an orphan?
Not spending 1h30 at the table every night with your dad yelling, "What's 2*3?!!" And you crying, "I don't know!!!"
I painted my dad white so he wouldn’t leave.
Orphans would be upset if they went to FamilyMart.
'Cause they sell oden, not a family.
Your mum isn't home.
Whenever my grandparents apologize, I say "forgive and forget". They are really obedient.
Here is a dark joke for you guys... "Why do pornstars scream, "DADDY!" in their videos? Because they were child molested by their father!"
I want to die in my sleep, like grandpa did, not screaming and crying like the people on the bus he drove.
What is an orphan's favorite flower? Self-raising. 😂
Why did the orphan call Mr. Smith "daddy"? Because he put her in the vices and taught her a lesson about virginity.
Knock, knock!
"Is that daddy?"
No, but I'm about to be, so get on your knees!
Why did the orphan call her boyfriend "daddy"?
Because she wanted that D.
Why do any orphans have sex?
Because they can't call anyone "daddy."
Son, you are not precious, so pack your bags because someone else is going to adopt you.
Dad, what do you mean someone else will adopt me?
Son, you're adopted!
How do you know that your sister is on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes weird.
What did the drummer call his 2 twin daughters?
Anna 1 Anna 2.