Family jokes
I got sent to the principal's office for giving an orphan kid a family-size pack.
I was at school when I remembered I forgot my necklace, then I screamed out, "Shit, I forgot Grandpa!"
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One gets picked.
Why can't orphans be in charge of making web pages?
Because they can't add a home page.
I asked a child where their parents were. They started to cry. I laughed and walked out of an orphanage.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.
Why can't an orphan build a website? Because it won't have a homepage.
Everyone else seems to have met my dad. I only have the mugshots.
What's an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it's the only thing that comes back to it.
Foreplay in may areas: "You awake?"
Way down South: "You awake, mom?"
My sister’s birthday is on 9/11. When she opened her presents, she jumped up with an explosion.
Teacher: I am an orphan.
Students: Oof.
Teacher: Is there anyone missing?
Students: Your parents!
What do you call an orphan who became a priest?
Father-less.
Why are orphans bad at baseball? They can't get home.
You could think that some orphans are gay.
But think, would they be home-osexual? 🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️
Teacher: I’m gonna call your parents.
Orphan: Go on, see if they pick up.
Why are orphans so bad at dodge ball?
They don't have a home to run to.
Why do orphans hate dodgeball?
No one misses them.
What is the orphan's version of a family portrait?
A selfie.
A father bought his depressed son a new house, and then pointing at it, he said, "Hang in there, son!"