Your mama so fat she’s on both sides of the family.
Family Jokes
Why didn't the opening photo actually have a pic of sex on it? I have always wanted to see porn, too bad I have parents and a school Chromebook.
What's the difference between cotton and an orphan?
Cotton gets picked.
Wanna know what an orphan's least favorite song is?
"More Than My Hometown."
Or is she asking her son, "Do you know Newton?"
The boy said, "No, I don't know."
She said to him, "If you had paid attention to your lessons, you would have known him!"
The boy said, "Ok, do you know Ikhlod?"
She said to him, "No, who is she?"
He said to her, "If you had paid attention to your husband, you would have known her."
The important thing is that the boy is currently a week with his uncles and a week with his turbans.
When do you know your dad knows you are sneaking out? He hears the loud creaks.
Dad, I hate you!
The way ladies cheat nowadays is very alarming.
She might give birth to twins, but each twin having a different father. 😭
Your mom! Oh wait, you don't have one.
Why can't an orphan get a tattoo at a young age?
They don't have parent permission.
Mom: Can I tell you a joke?
Kid: Sure.
Mom: Knock knock.
Kid: Who's there?
Mom: Not yo.
Kid: Not yo who?
Mom: Not yo father.
Kid: Not yo husband either.
Billy: Hey kid, why are you sad?
Orphan: Oh, I'm waiting for my parents.
Billy: Oh, and how long have you been here?
Orphan: About 200 years.
Bro, the Twin Towers are like my grandpa and his friends. One survived—my grandpa. The others have fallen—his friends.
I gave my sister a compliment and said she's pretty, then while she was saying thanks, I said, "pretty ugly."
Me: You are pretty. Her: Thanks. Me: Pretty ugly.
I'm such a good babysitter because the last person I babysat was so flat.
I tried to give directions to an orphan, but he got lost because there was no home.
I told my mom to get rope for a project, and when she got home, I got the good old coat hanger out and hung myself up.
Your mum's hairline was so long that you decided to get therapy.
Your dad's hairline was so long that he died.
Your mother's hairline is sooooooo long cause Dora the Explorer could not explore it.
