Exercise jokes

Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exercise. They got up into the air and Jim said, "Okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want." Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, "I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire." Allyn said "What?" as he looked over at Jim.

What do fat demons hate? Exorcise.

I was asked to give a bicycle joke, but I couldn't...

I was two tired.

Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted, but man who runs in front of car will get tired.

Why did the gym close down? -- It just didn't work out.

What do sprinters eat before a race?

Nothing, they fast.

Yo mama is so unfamiliar with the gym, she calls it James.

When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he's pushing the Earth down.

When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat children into the fire.

"Chuck? How many push-ups can you do?" -- "All of them."