Exaggeration jokes

Your mum is so fat, when she was sitting on a scale, the number couldn't even fit on the scale and came shooting out!

Yo mama so fat when the doctor saw her weight on the scale he said, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number!"

My wife is so fat! She wears high heels, she strikes oil.

When she sits around the house, she really sits *around* the house. Every time she turns around, it's her birthday.

My wife is so fat, she gets home, her ass gets home a half hour later.

Yo mama was so fat that when she stepped on the scale, the scale said: "OOOWWWWW!!!! Get off me, you overweight bucket of lard."

Yo mama is so fat that when she is about to put her foot on the scale, the scale begs for mercy.

Your hairline is so nonexistent, even the universe couldn't find it.