Why was three afraid of two? Because he killed everyone!
Every Jokes
When I was little, I would pray to Jesus every night for him to get me a new bike. I learned one week in Sunday school that that's not how it works, so instead I just stole one and asked him for forgiveness.
Why does Trump always ensure he has a second pair of pants with him every weekend?
In case he gets a hole in one.
As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing.
Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.
I think my coworkers are gay. -- Every time I walk by, they mumble, "What an ass."
If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.
My town's population never changes. Every time a girl gets pregnant, a guy leaves town.
"Mom? Don't freak out, but I'm in the hospital."
"Aaron, you've been a doctor for over 8 years now, please stop starting every phone conversation we have with that."
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a ravishing blonde, and an old lady are sharing a compartment on a train as it winds its way through the Alps. Every now and then the train passes through a tunnel, during which time the compartment is plunged into complete darkness. On one such occasion, a ringing slap is heard, and as the train passes back into daylight, the Frenchman is rubbing his sore, red cheek.
The old lady thinks, "I bet that dirty Frenchman fondled the blonde, and she struck the pervert."
The blonde thinks, "I bet that filthy Frenchman was looking to grope me in the dark, mistook the old lady for me, and she slapped him."
The Frenchman thinks, "I bet that perfidious Englishman touched up the blonde in the dark, and she slapped me by mistake."
The Englishman thinks, "I can't wait for another tunnel so I can slap that French twat again."
