Evers jokes

Do you ever get that feeling where you're just going through a school parking lot, then you realize that there are no parking lots?

You ever get the feeling when your parents are cheating on you? I do.

I learned that humans eat more bananas than monkeys...

Huh, I don’t recall ever eating a monkey!

I have the funniest joke ever, here it is...

Your face!

Have you ever been to the ocean? Well, the smokers out there probably only seaweed!

Did you ever walk into Stephen Hawking's house?

Answer: No, neither did he.

Best chick ever.

Call me at 6969696969.

Why don't rappers ever become bankers?

Because they always break the BARS!

Have you ever wondered why you never see a gay guy in a wheelchair?

It’s hard to become a vegetable when you’re already a fruit.

It’s like Sonic always says, “If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?”

Have you ever had a bad sausage? It's the wurst.

Why don't rappers ever get LOST?

Because they always find their way with their GPS (Great Poetic Skills).

Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered, "Y?"

The reason why in the US their emergency number is 911 is because of my uncle Mohamed, RIP, best pilot ever.

You are about to hear the funniest joke ever.

My life.

Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?

No? Neither did he.

Have you ever felt an earthquake? It’s not nature; it’s Brandan Bressler.

Where did the king hide his armies?

In his sleevies.

Worst joke ever.

Ever had a migraine? Yeah, sorry that’s my fault. Couple years ago, all my grains got loose.

Ever since convicted New York State felon Donald John Trump has taken office, the Canada-US border has been a mess of tariffs, counter-tariffs and boycotts.

And where does it end? I just got served a salad with 500 Islands in the dressing instead of a thousand. The price was the same.