the only problem being short and gay is that when ever i try to tell people im top in my relationship they don't believe me because im shorter then the person im dating like wtf
stop ruining the jokes its called worst jokes ever for a reason we all feel bad for orphans but people like dark humor and joke about everyone so quit being offended plz
So, I got my blind friend a big Mac for his birthday, a week later he walked up to me and said "Damn, that was the most violent book I've ever read."
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!” The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”
how do you surprise 50 year old man? by putting a 12 inch dick through his ass. He said " best surprise ever"
What is the most expensive type of sex you will ever enjoy in your life? The type which will shorten your life by 5 to 10 years
A guy is bankrupt so he gives his son a duck and tells him to go sell it for as much as he can. So the kid goes on the street to sell the duck. A prostitute walks by and says I'll fuck you for $10. The boy says “I would but I don't have any money.” She says “Ok, I'll take the duck instead.” He says ok so they go up stairs and fuck. The prostitute says “That’s the best sex I've ever had. I'll give you the duck back and we can do it again.” So they do and he gets the duck back. But when they go downstairs the duck gets hit by a car. And the guy that hit the duck feels so bad that he gives the kid $25. So when he gets home his father asks him why he looks so tired. The boy says well I got a fuck for a duck, a duck for a fuck, and $25 for a fucked up fuck.
Why don’t rappers ever get cold?
Because they have so many FANS
Why don't rappers ever get lost?
Because they always have BARS on their GPS
Why don't rappers ever play baseball?
Because they're too busy DROPPING HITS
Why don't rappers ever become chefs?
Because they can't stop droppin' the BEET
Wats only book rapeboat ever read? Rhyming dictionary, he got no rhymes without it
Wats the funniest thing u ever read? 4 me it wusz when rapboat told me he wuz a legit rapper.
Wots the funniest joke ever? rapboat thinking he can rap.
so i walked into my bathroom to clean some stuff and no one ever told me you cant put put phones in the bathtub
Have you ever tried Ethiopian food?
Neither have they.
I got barred from weight watchers today it wasn't my fault it was the fat ass next to me who spilled her box of maltesers onto the floor in the middle of the room all i did was say that it was the funniest game of hungry hungry hippo's that I have ever seen
I asked my nan if she wouldnt mind shitting in a bucket when we went camping, she replied why the fuck would i want to sit in a bucket, so eventually she did and i took the best shit i have ever had
If a computer was an apartment, the only passage would be the windows. It would have had doors but why was it ever spelt DOS
What's the difference between the 44 out of the 45 people who died in the Yaroslavl crash and the nine people who died in the helicopter crash? Only one was ever famous. Vasicek and Kobe Bryant were the champions
