Evers jokes

The Blonde got a Ph.D.?

Yeah, like that would ever happen.

Angela: Kris, I just met the nicest, sweetest guy ever.

Kristie: Who is he and what is his name?

Angela: His name is Kevin.

Kristie: Kevin? I remember him. He said he had to go to Italy for a meeting, never seen him after that. What the hell is Kevin doing here?

Angela: I don't know.

If your parents ever accuse you of lying... Say, "You're the one who told me about Santa Claus!"

To all of you making jokes about orphans, it’s all fun and games until both of your parents leave you.

LMFAO (my parents left me and it’s not the funniest thing ever)

Whoever is reading this, I hope you have a good day because I feel bad you're so short.

I had the WORST day ever. My ex was sent to the hospital from a gun, and I got my hunting license removed.

If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Hello, I am the WJE (WORST JOKES EVER) Bot. Like this post if you think it's good; dislike if you think it's bad!

Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house? Don't worry, he hasn't neither.

Ever heard of the band "Nothing but Thieves"?

Yeah, it's called RobberBand.

Has anyone else ever been jealous when their laptop dies?

"I heard a noise in the basement! I'm gonna go to my friend's house and play Minecraft with him until the noise I heard goes away."

"I heard a noise in the basement. I'm gonna go down there with a bazooka and thirty thousand rounds of pistol ammo and fifty thousand pistols."

Said no horror movie character ever.

And also GTA logic.

Why did the Puerto Rican American 🇺🇸 🇵🇷 that was a gay male 🇺🇸 🇵🇷 that was born physically challenged not say anything to a group of gay white men that were not physically challenged after they called him a size queen after the Puerto Rican American 🇺🇸 🇵🇷 that was born physically challenged was done taking turns giving them a blowjob and was done taking turns swallowing their sweet cum? 🇺🇸 🇵🇷

Because it was the best meal that he ever had since he has been in prison for 30 years. 🇺🇸 🇵🇷

You've heard of anal sex.

You've heard of oral sex.

You've heard of genital sex.

But have you ever heard of NASAL SEX?

Why does Stephen Hawking have the voice of an angel?

Because no one has ever heard an angel talk.

I still remember the third of December, me in your sweater. You said it looked better on me than it did you. Only if you knew how much I liked you. But I watch your eyes as she walks by. What a sight for sore eyes, Brighter than the blue sky. She's got you mesmerized while I die. Why would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half as pretty. You gave her your sweater, it's just polyester, But you like her better. Wish I were Heather. Watch as she stands with her, holding your hand. Put your arm 'round her shoulder, now I'm getting colder. But how could I hate her, she's such an angel. But then again, kinda wish she were dead as she walks by. What a sight for sore eyes. Brighter than the blue sky. She's got you mesmerized while I die. Why would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half as pretty. You gave her your sweater, it's just polyester, But you like her better. I wish I were Heather. Oh, I wish I were Heather. Oh, oh, wish I were Heather. Why would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half as pretty. You gave her your sweater, it's just polyester, But you like her better. Wish I were-

Me. I am the worst joke ever.

Last week was my blind friend's birthday. I thought I would give him something really good that he may need.

As I walk into his house and give him a cheese grater for a birthday present, he sets it next to him. As weeks pass, he comes up to me. He said, "That present that you gave me for my birthday was the most intense book I have ever read!"

If you ever get bored, just punch an orphan. I mean, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Nothing bad ever happens to the Kennedys! Except that one headshot, but we don’t talk about that.