What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.
"9/11 was just a really intense game of Jenga."
You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?
Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.
I was going to watch the origami world championships before it folded.
But it was only on paper view.
Person 1: Hey, did you hear about the circus fire?
Person 2: No.
Person 1: It was in-tents.
9/11.
Your mama so stupid, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
اي تيجي اللمة بتخلص your storage
What does a man with no arms or legs do on Halloween?
Nothing.
I'm doing a charity bungee jump for the local disabled.
It's called "spastics on elastics."
What ended in 1999? 1998.
Two antennas got married on a roof. The ceremony was horrible, but the reception was great!
Two artists had an art contest. It ended in a draw.
How does NASA organize a party? -- They planet.
Why did 10 die? -- He was in the middle of 9/11.
The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologized to the Olympic Committee after realizing that sailing and shooting were two separate events.
Yo mama so fat, she has her own event horizon.
What was the last thing going through the minds of the people who jumped out of the buildings during 9/11?
Their ankles.
Why didn't anyone care about the circus?
Because it was irr-elephant.
