Etiquette jokes

"I'm sorry" and "my bad" mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.

I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home.

So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.

When I bring someone breakfast in bed, I want to hear a thank you. And no, “What are you doing in my house?”

I called my sister a party pooper after she came to my party uninvited.

Grampa said that the only ones who poop at parties are the ones who don't get invited.

So I guess that means I was the party pooper at my own birthday?

A bowman walked into a throne room, and he bowed to him.

Hi Prince.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose 👃, but you can't pick your friends' noses 👃 👃 👃.

You're at a funeral. Your mum says be quiet, so you snigger at the body and say, "Bye forever, bitch."

Why should you always knock on the fridge door before opening it?

The salad could be dressing!

Why are french fries rude?

"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing, except at a funeral.