Emotion jokes
Every time someone calls me fat I get so depressed I cut myself...
A piece of cake.
I bet emo kids are jealous when their phone dies.
Who can jump the highest? Depressed asses, some say they’re still in the air.
What music do depressed people listen to?
"I Believe I Can Fly."
I have depression, but I don't know how to show it in feelings.
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
Is depression sadness or happiness? I call it a fun time.
My crush: OMG, my dog just died!😭😭😭😭😭
Me: Oh my goodness, I am so sorry. I am here for you!
My crush: I have a boyfriend...🙄
Me: Yeah well, I have a dog.
What’s the difference between an onion and a photo of a dead relative? Nothing, they both make you cry when you look at it.
How do you lift a depressed person up?
No need, they'll find a way to get on the tree somehow.
I know it sounds cheesy, but I feel grate!
What is hard about having a relationship with an astronaut?
They are always so distant! :-]
People might not laugh at my jokes, or have a reaction at all, but I'd explode with euphoria.
Periodically, people might laugh every now and then.
Someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.
Papyrus: HUMAN, WHY ARE YOU SAD?
Me: I'm just BONELY.
Sans: Good one kiddo.
If you are depressed, eat Panera Bread. It is so yummy yum yyum yum yum yum.
Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Prospero Ano y Felicidad.
Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Prospero Ano y Felicidad.
I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas From the bottom of my heart.
How do you tell a child they have cancer?
With a smile on your face.
My friend fell on the Nile river and Egypt last week.
He swears by it, but he’s in denial.
Whenever I order coffee, I always get the depresso with extra depresso sauce.
Guys, I promise I’m not suicidal, I just like dark things.
*proceeds to walk around the house with headphones in and stare at the ceiling while laying down on the couch*