Education jokes
We asked our teacher many times for an atlas, and he said, "At last, you can have one!"
A kid walks into the classroom on time.
Someone burgled my house the other day. It was terrible.
They ripped all of the front and back pages of my dictionaries. Things went from bad to worse.
Muslims commit suicide to go to Paradise and get 72 virgins... I just go to the local primary school.
How does a mathematician get tan?
sin/cos.
Why did the math book go to the psychologist?
It had too many problems.
Why doesn't the Sun go to college? Because it has a million degrees.
Why can't college students take exams at the zoo?
Too many cheetahs!
Where did Milky Way get its degree?
At the university.
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? -- "Bison."
Where do you learn to make ice cream? -- Sundae school.
Why was 9 afraid of 20?
Because 28, 29.
What does one math book say to the other? -- "Don't bother me. I've got my own problems!"
Why didn't the bear go to college?
Because bears don't go to college.
Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. "1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10."
What did the Indian boy say to his mother as he left for school? -- "Mumbai!"
What did the mermaid wear for math class?
Algaebra.
Where do kittens go on a field trip?
The meowseum.
How do you say goodbye to a calculus teacher?
Calculator!
What's the difference between a teacher and a train?
The teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Chew chew!"